So, 2012.
WHAT A YEAR.
January through May felt like it's own year because of all the life events we jam packed into those months. I naively thought life would slow down once we moved. HA! June through December felt like another entire year.
January: We drove to College Station for our annual MLK weekend celebration with the Seidels. It was and still is one of our very favorite traditions. We just bought our tickets to the next one in a couple of weeks!
February: We drove one weekend to Lubbock and the next to Frost for wedding showers. So many miles, so little sleep.
March: The best and busiest month of our year. I went to College Station for my bachelorette party one weekend, I turned 23 the next, Taylor got his first choice aircraft, and the last weekend we got married.
April: Taylor graduated from Pilot training and we enjoyed the next three weeks of marriage living in a bedroom of a friend's house. (Once we were married, Taylor no longer qualified for single officer housing and had to move out of his house. Since we would be moving soon though, the base wouldn't give us our own.) I finished up work and Taylor left for a month of training. (A month of training that would forever change our life plans.)
May: I spent the month moving our stuff into storage (during the one and only torrential downpour in Del Rio, Texas), and also traveling to see family that we would soon be far away from.
June: We moved! The day before we pulled into our new home, we got a phone call letting us know that we would be moving a week later to California for the next three months. Our new home proved to be mucho fun and adventurous. Not so fun was the lack of a kitchen. We ate approximately 80 sandwiches between the two of us during June.
July: More of the same as June. Also, more sandwiches.
August: The lowest and craziest month of our year. Taylor was diagnosed with diabetes and we learned that flying planes was no longer in his future. We were pretty bummed but glad that Taylor was finally healthy again. (Remember the month long trip in May? That's when it all started!)
September: We moved back to Jersey and began assembling our first home together. (We had never lived together in anything but a single bedroom or a hotel room.) Taylor's mom and sister were our very first visitors!
October: This is the one month that I don't remember. We had a trip to Texas for a wedding, our first East Coast fall, and a few Ikea adventures. Taylor also started working on building our bed! Oh, and a hurricane.
November: The hurricane was followed by four days of no power and sinking temperatures. Just as our lights (and heat!) came back on, we found ourselves in the middle of a Nor'easter. The next day, temperatures were back up into the 60's and the snow was gone along with all the pretty leaves. We spent Thanksgiving in DC with Taylor's sister and then welcomed our second visitors the week after!
December: Taylor turned 25 and we hung out with Katie and Kirsten in The Big Apple. I spent a week in Texas with my family and then it was time to head to Lubbock for Christmas. We just got back and are getting ready to spend our first New Year's Eve all by ourselves. (Sidenote: Today is NINE months of marriage!)
So like I said...the year was absolutely insane. I don't know how we made it out alive, but here we are, preparing for another one. I hope I'm ready for whatever crazy 2013 decides to bring. (But no babies, please.)
Pages
12.31.2012
12.19.2012
So much to say...
I tried over and over again to write an update on our lives for a while, but every time I started a new post, I felt too vulnerable writing about how we were actually doing. I didn't want to be upbeat and jokey when in reality, I wanted to completely erase the month of August. So, I took a break from blogging for a few months. I felt like I didn't have anything to write about, which isn't true because a lot has happened in a very short time. I have a lot of adventures to recap, but they just don't seem all that fun to talk about anymore. Looking back at all of those pictures is kind of a sucky reminder of a not so fun month.
When Taylor was diagnosed with Diabetes, it really threw me for a loop. (I feel really lame for saying that because clearly, the world does not revolve around me.) At first, I worried constantly about Taylor and his health. I asked what every blood sugar was, I went to every appointment, and I even panicked every time he rolled over in bed.
I think it was a control thing for me. I couldn't control what was happening to his body, so I worried instead. Slowly, (and I do mean s-l-o-w-l-y) I began to let some of those worries go. If Taylor's sugar is low, I've got life savers in my purse. I don't ask him every twenty minutes if he needs them anymore. If he wants to eat a snack, I don't ask if he adjusted his insulin for it. When he goes to the doctor, I ask if he wants me to come and if not, I ask how it went afterwards. I had to realize that Taylor is a very logical and competent big boy. He knows what he is feeling and how to adjust if something is off. I had to learn to be supportive of his treatment and not police his habits.
I'm not saying that I don't worry anymore. But it's not the same paralyzing fear that at any moment something could go terribly wrong. I trust Taylor to communicate with me when he isn't feeling well and for me, that's a big step.
Our life has taken a much different path than we could have ever dreamed of. Sometimes it hurts to think back even just a few months to when we were so unaware of what lay ahead. As dramatic as it sounds, the plans we made for our future fell like a stack of cards in August. With the diagnosis not only came a lifestyle change, but also a career change for Taylor. My heart breaks every time I think about his dream of being a pilot being taken away. I can't express how grateful I am to still have Taylor with me, much less a more healthy version of himself, but as humans we always want that cherry on top. If we lived in a perfect world, the rules would be changed tomorrow and life would get back to our old normal by the weekend.
A week after we got back from California, my friend Jocelyn invited me to see Beth Moore live in Pennsylvania. For the past month, my heart had been running on empty. I was sick with worry and stress, I couldn't sleep, and was one wrong turn from an emotional breakdown. The conference was exactly what I needed to refill my tank and keep me going. Every word was the exact one I needed to hear. I left the arena that day still sad, stressed, and worried, but ready to face those emotions with a renewed energy. One of her speaking points that day was "Faith trusts that every call to forsake is a call to also take." It stuck with me and when I am feeling especially sorry for myself and our situation, I am reminded that even though our plan for our life was forsaken, we have taken a new life to live. Being sad about the old path doesn't let me enjoy our new one!
Once we got accustomed to our new life on the East Coast and the new routines involved, we were able to finally relax. We have explored our surroundings a bit, spent time with people we love, and gotten involved in our neighborhood. Sometimes things seem a little unfair, but overall we are having a blast.
Just so this post isn't all doom and gloom, I've decided to include some of our highlights from the past few months.
I know those aren't all of our big events, but the rest will have to wait because I just can't remember them. I try hard to stay positive on my blog and even though this post was mostly down in the dumps, I really needed to write it. I enjoy writing and I'm hoping that I'll be able to stay more up to date on our happenings. Who knows, maybe next time, I'll be back with another LBMM story.
When Taylor was diagnosed with Diabetes, it really threw me for a loop. (I feel really lame for saying that because clearly, the world does not revolve around me.) At first, I worried constantly about Taylor and his health. I asked what every blood sugar was, I went to every appointment, and I even panicked every time he rolled over in bed.
I think it was a control thing for me. I couldn't control what was happening to his body, so I worried instead. Slowly, (and I do mean s-l-o-w-l-y) I began to let some of those worries go. If Taylor's sugar is low, I've got life savers in my purse. I don't ask him every twenty minutes if he needs them anymore. If he wants to eat a snack, I don't ask if he adjusted his insulin for it. When he goes to the doctor, I ask if he wants me to come and if not, I ask how it went afterwards. I had to realize that Taylor is a very logical and competent big boy. He knows what he is feeling and how to adjust if something is off. I had to learn to be supportive of his treatment and not police his habits.
I'm not saying that I don't worry anymore. But it's not the same paralyzing fear that at any moment something could go terribly wrong. I trust Taylor to communicate with me when he isn't feeling well and for me, that's a big step.
Our life has taken a much different path than we could have ever dreamed of. Sometimes it hurts to think back even just a few months to when we were so unaware of what lay ahead. As dramatic as it sounds, the plans we made for our future fell like a stack of cards in August. With the diagnosis not only came a lifestyle change, but also a career change for Taylor. My heart breaks every time I think about his dream of being a pilot being taken away. I can't express how grateful I am to still have Taylor with me, much less a more healthy version of himself, but as humans we always want that cherry on top. If we lived in a perfect world, the rules would be changed tomorrow and life would get back to our old normal by the weekend.
A week after we got back from California, my friend Jocelyn invited me to see Beth Moore live in Pennsylvania. For the past month, my heart had been running on empty. I was sick with worry and stress, I couldn't sleep, and was one wrong turn from an emotional breakdown. The conference was exactly what I needed to refill my tank and keep me going. Every word was the exact one I needed to hear. I left the arena that day still sad, stressed, and worried, but ready to face those emotions with a renewed energy. One of her speaking points that day was "Faith trusts that every call to forsake is a call to also take." It stuck with me and when I am feeling especially sorry for myself and our situation, I am reminded that even though our plan for our life was forsaken, we have taken a new life to live. Being sad about the old path doesn't let me enjoy our new one!
Once we got accustomed to our new life on the East Coast and the new routines involved, we were able to finally relax. We have explored our surroundings a bit, spent time with people we love, and gotten involved in our neighborhood. Sometimes things seem a little unfair, but overall we are having a blast.
Just so this post isn't all doom and gloom, I've decided to include some of our highlights from the past few months.
- Taylor has started woodworking and we should hopefully be sleeping in a handmade bed in a couple of days! Up next for him is a dining room table to replace the card table currently occupying our home.
- We survived Hurricane Sandy with a shingle as the only casualty. The 4 day power outage was painful, but we were thankful to have a place to sleep and shower. (Even if both were less than ideal temperatures.)
- During the hurricane, I started reading the Janet Evanovich series and throughout the month of November, I caught up on all NINETEEN of the books. Once I returned the last book to the library, I had a moment of not knowing what to do with my free time anymore. I'm currently searching for a new book to read!
- We've traveled to DC and NYC a couple of times. Our first trip to NYC was days after hurricane Sandy and it was quite an experience. Half the city was still without power and under water. By the time we got back up there, everything was pretty much back to normal. However, choosing to go the weekend that the Rockefeller tree was lit was not our best idea.
- We put up our first Christmas tree! Taylor was hesitant at first since we won't be in town for Christmas, but I eventually talked him into it. A tree definitely makes our house a little more homey during the holidays as well as making me feel like a real adult.
I know those aren't all of our big events, but the rest will have to wait because I just can't remember them. I try hard to stay positive on my blog and even though this post was mostly down in the dumps, I really needed to write it. I enjoy writing and I'm hoping that I'll be able to stay more up to date on our happenings. Who knows, maybe next time, I'll be back with another LBMM story.
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